I've lost my mind.

Today, I ventured out in public alone for the first time without a child in a very, very long time. With the exception of a wedding, I have not been out without the newest little alone. By myself. In public. 

Apparently, I've lost my ever-loving mind. 

A little guy just tried to talk to me. I told his parents to get him away from me. I followed it up with a quick laugh, stumbled over an explanation about how this is my first time out and I have a newborn and and and...and tried to act normal from then on. I'm sure it totally worked. The lack of make up and jacked up pony tail that comes with short hair that doesn't really fit in a pony tail holder totally helped my disguise. 

I don't think this post is helping convince anyone that I really am sane. 

Can we just be honest for a second? My sanity has absolutely been slipping. Last night, I went plumb off the reservation. My husband was quick to rescue me by inviting some dear friends to come wrangle my two under two so I could escape. And guys, I needed that escape. 

I love my kids. I really do (my parting words to said friends as I frantically ran to my car when they arrived). But if I don't take time to love me, I cannot love them well. 

I think more women need to hear that message. There is no glory in martyrdom; you are doing no one, especially your children, any good if you don't practice a level of self-care that allows time for your self-expression, introspection, restoration, resurrection. 

A cappuccino sipped in solitude is full of so much healing.